OMG. Cannabis sex lube, it exists!

Between two photos of the “personal lubricant experimental test batch” bottles recently posted on Facebook and Instagram, Colorado manufacturer, Apothecanna, was flooded with a hundred sales inquiries for the personal lube.  This is a hot product, everybody wants some!

But cannabis sex lube doesn’t really exist in the commercial world.  This is a research and development test batch made for kicks and giggles, and the company has no plans of releasing it as a product. There is no way to order it, not in the adult recreational market and not as a medical marijuana patient.  It’s not for sale and this product review is one big tease.

In a chat with James Kennedy, Apothecanna owner, I learned the sex lube recipe is an adaptation of Apothecanna’s popular Lip Buzz, medicated lip balm available in the Colorado medical marijuana market.  Both the personal lube and Lip Buzz contain the same botanical oils and essential oils of cannabis flowers, organic peppermint, organic tea tree, organic rosemary, grapefruit, and ylang ylang. This means the signature smell, anti-bacterial and anti-viral properties are the same, making these cosmetic pharmaceuticals or “cosmeceuticals”.

Cannabis flower oil, as a topical ingredient, doesn’t induce a high or have any kind of psychoactive effects. Instead, it stimulates blood flow. Mmm, interesting! Rounding out the list of ingredients is a base of blended gels from flax seeds and aloe and a small amount of silicone.

That’s fascinating and all, but how was the whoopee?  Here’s the method to the sexy madness:  I scored two sample bottles.  I enlisted two horny and vocal volunteers, with their sex partners to kick it with the lube.   I promised not to use their names (high five, thanks for banging!).  Then, like a freaky voyeur/social scientist, I made them fill out a questionnaire asking questions about their knowledge of lubes and natural products and the in-and-out details of their sex experiences with the cannabis lube.  I even asked about ladies squirting with a big O.

The first couple swears by lube. Although new to warming lubes, these lovers have seasoned knowledge of lubes and natural lubes. The natural and organic formulation was a big attraction.

Although my first female tester was initially hesitant to introduce the essential oils to her mucous membranes (that’s the cooter to some readers), she eventually went for it, and it did not irritate the sensitive tissues around her hoo hoo.

“Overall, the cannabis lube had good liquid cohesion, staying where you wanted it to. I liked the globby texture – it stayed slippery without getting sticky,” she reported. “It absorbs into the skin, which is not great for glide.  (But) it didn’t dry sticky on the skin and the scent… the scent of the cannabis lube lingers, you’d remember your lover long into the day.”

The second couple has used natural products, but never a natural lube. No stranger to conventional warming gels, the couple reported “the cannabis seems to add a nice stimulating effect.”  Although not a fan of the “sliminess,” the smell of the lube was enjoyed and the couple had a lot of fun with their first shared experience with sex lube.

The warming or numbing sensation of the lube made for some fun applications during sex for both couples.  The first couple enjoyed “awesome foreplay” and the lube made a “great orgasm chaser”.   For the second couple, performing anal sex was the best part.  Doink!

Multiple orgasms were achieved by both couples.  Everyone had enthusiastic fun with the cannabis sex lube and would like to sample more. Sad to say, neither woman achieved a squirting orgasm, but if at first you don’t succeed, try, try again!

You may have heard about the speakers, the massive smoke outs and other highlights of 2013′s Seattle Hempfests, but did you know there were daily fashion shows in the Hemposium Tent?

I co-produced the show, Fashion with a Passion for Freedom, with Hemposium Manager Pam Haley, featuring garments from established hemp clothing companies across the country and exciting pieces made by fresh design students at Seattle-based NY Fashion Academy.

Local fashion design students utilized bolts of hemp fabrics to create savvy garments for this first legal hemp fashion show in post I-502 Washington State. All participating clothing companies were founded in the 1990s and the well-constructed garments on the runway reflected the accrued experience in workmanship and clothing design.

The companies featured at the fashion show this year were excellent examples of eco-friendly organizations dedicated to environmental preservation with style.

Earth Creations

Earth Creations,based in Bessemer, Alabama, creates casual and fashionable seasonal styles in hemp and organic cotton jersey. Dyed with locally-sourced natural clays, these garments are designed for mixing and matching for a variety of up-to-date looks.

Earth Creations’ runway offerings included a ruffled Lucca shrug in taupe, paired with a flounced Sydney dress and flared Arabesque skirt worn as a strapless dress.

A 3-Dragonfly printed tank, ruffle Capri leggings, and Lucca shrug in aqua blue made a comfortable casual outfit.

The hooded Sadie dress with decorative front button jacket looked good as a tunic with skinny jeans or as a short dress.

Earth Creations clothing is stylish casual wear for earth lovers of all ages.

Amsterdam hemp clothing company, Hemp Hoodlamb, and its North American flagship store, Hoodlab, showed off select women’s garments from HHL’s urban eco-friendly clothing line.

HHL’s outerwear included a signature winter coat from the Sea Shepherd line, a pea coat and summer jacket.

All outerwear is solidly constructed with hemp fabrics, double stitched at stress points, and reinforced with a hemp cellulose water and wind proofing treatment.

The HHL signature winter coats are lined in luxurious Satifur, an exclusive blend of hemp, recycled PET plastic and acrylic fur.

House of Hoodlab custom screen printed hemp and organic cotton t-shirts were paired with stylish herringbone-weave miniskirts and shorts with pleated front pockets. Hemp Hoodlamb’s clothing is perfect for people who appreciate an urban clothing style.

Dress by Earth Creations, bag by Dharma Bags
Photo by Josh Rettie

Dharma Bags from Taos Hemp Company are beautiful and utilitarian travel bags for women and men. The three styles of bags are sewn in Taos, New Mexico with premium woven hemp in gorgeous solid colors.

Practical for everyday use, Dharma Bags can hold a lot of life’s necessities. The wide shoulder strap comfortably distributes the full weight of the bag’s content.  However functional, it is the simple and elegant beauty of Dharma Bags that inspires their everyday use.

Conscious Clothing, a green bridal boutique based in Santa Fe, New Mexico, stunned the audience with wedding couture.

The first gown, a corseted feathered top with peacock feathers and full skirt were made from a hemp and silk floral jacquard. A simple and elegant bias cut gown shimmered in hemp silk satin with a sheer chiffon train overlay.

Conscious Clothing green wedding couture. Photo by Susan Squibb.

The “Steam Punk” gown, made of hemp silk satin had an elaborate bottom ruffle around the full skirt. A raw edged organic cotton voile ruffle runs around the neck that draped down the back to create a very becoming dress.

In addition to bridal wear, Conscious Clothing will soon be launching an evening wear collection.

The future of hemp fashion was showcased by the designing talent at NY Fashion Academy. Four designers came up with innovative cannabis lifestyle clothing utilizing hemp fabrics from EnviroTextilesand HempTraders.

Erika Ray crafted unique hand dyed and hand painted hoodies from hemp and organic cotton for cozy cool street looks that heal the planet.

Malia Peoples, constructed an oversized smoking jacket, for local musician Boris Budd, with classic natural hemp fabric and accented cuffs.

Hand-dyed and painted hoodie by Erika Ray. Photo by Josh Rettie

Kiymbah Tytania designed couture men’s and women’s trim aprons with black hemp fabric and red pocket, ruffle and tie accents.

The attractive and practical aprons have handy pockets for holding trimming scissors, cell phones and rolling papers.

A wide pocket in the front of the men’s apron catches loose trim to roll up a doobie for break time!

Marcella Kelly presented the exquisite Seattle Colorfest collection.

Marcella made a dark green hemp and cotton jersey knit dress with black hemp silk yokes, side panels, accents, and a black hemp silk charmeuse corset belt.

The belt contained handy lifestyle stash pockets. A pair of his and hers High Society smoking jackets, made for Seattle Hempfest organizers, Vivian McPeak and  Kanti Selig ,were constructed out of plum Hempcel fabric with black hemp silk charmeuse collars, cuffs and pocket welts. Specialty pockets on the inside hold legal cannabis and accouterment.

The most surprising outfit in the Colorfest collection was a bright coral jersey knit t-shirt dress with hemp silk collar paired with a yellow hemp silk pleated asymmetrical skirt with a grommet waistband. This lightweight and festive garment wowed the eco-fashionistas in the crowd.

I’m an enthusiastic consumer and product tester of hemp and marijuana products.  This column showcases  the best of what I see and sample in the marketplace.

Do you eat hemp? You should. Hemp seed is a superfood, it contains all necessary macronutrients, complete protein and healthy polyunsaturated fats.  Hemp seed meat tastes simple, sweet and nutty.  Thankfully, getting the amazing health benefits of hemp is so easy with shelled hemp seeds.

Shelled hemp seed is one of the best innovations in hemp food. There are several brands of shelled hemp seeds, all of comparable and consistent high quality. I like them all, but I like the warmth of Hemp Hearts as a product name. So I tend to buy Hemp Hearts.  Who loves you?

Hemp loves you!

Hemp Hearts makes eating healthier plain and easy. My standard recipe for instant health food is fix whatever I’m eating and then right before serving,  I sprinkle some Hemp Hearts on the  dish.  With  3 tablespoons sprinkled on top,  a  boost of 10 grams of complete protein and  11 grams of  polyunsaturated Omega oils, in the perfect 3 to 1 ratio, gets added to the meal. Simple and easy.  For more hemp nutritional information, go here.

A remedial reminder: You cannot get high from eating hemp food. You cannot eat hemp and test positive for THC.   Any sensation of being high or stoned is purely a placebo effect. It’s fun to pretend though.

Hemp Hearts are made by Manitoba Harvest.   Manitoba Harvest, was founded in 1998, with the goals to educate consumers and manufacture the highest quality hemp foods.   Their ethics and social responsibility are part of the company structure. For example, one of Manitoba Harvest’s company commitments is to use organic and non-gmo food sources. You can be happy knowing your consumer purchasing power is supporting a conscious company and industrial hemp agriculture in North America.

So, start eating hemp regularly.    Hemp Hearts are available in health food stores and vitamin and supplement stores. Go to  http://www.manitobaharvest.com/ for more  information or to order your own Hemp Hearts.

10) Orpheo & the Wrench The Grassroots Stage offered more musical variety than the two other stages, which were primarily dance whomp and wub wub wub DJs. Orpheo & the Wrench, a Denver based acoustic duo, played an enjoyable set and the most surprising part was their homespun spoof of “The Devil Went Down To Georgia” telling a tale of the Devil going to Denver and getting smoked out. I was squealing with laughter.

Caps by Visual Fiber

8) Green Man Cannabis Denver dispensary, Green Man Cannabis, has colorful and appealing T-shirts and stickers. Their booth was a fun stop in the vendor row. You could try to win a T-shirt of your choice in a modified corn hole game. You could yuck it up and have your picture taken with a bong smoking Jack Herer stand-in. The free “got THC?” temporary tattoos were a fun alternative to stickers.

In the Jack Herer cutout, smokin’ a bong!

7) Mahatma/Strainwise Mahatma, a Denver concentrate company, and Strainwise, a family of dispensaries, had a sleek, professional and comfortable booth in a spacious 10 x 20 tent. The booth was open and provided shade and a space to chill. Their booth had a tall dab bar, black leather couch and love seat, and a large urn of medicated iced tea. The 6 Million Dollar Man was comically posed with Mahatma’s 2013 Cannabis Cup for Best Concentrate on the dab bar.

The 6 Million Dollar Man posed with Mahatma’s 2013 Cannabis Cup for Best Concentrate on the dab bar.

6) Sohiyo Sohiyo, a California-based clothing and merchandise company, will outfit you in dab culture coolness. Sohiyo had lightweight and eco-friendly bamboo sunglasses and bold Brandalism Stickers and T-shirts, among other items.

Sustainable bamboo sunglasses by Sohiyo.

5) The Green Team The do-good Green Team from Denver Relief walked the event site and kept the grounds clean to ensure cannabis events have a positive impact in the community by keeping things green and clean.

The Green Team, keepin’ it clean!

4) Grassroots California Grassroots California encouraged audience participation with a painted hat competition. 12 contestants entered the painted hat competition to win $710 in cash, $710 Grassroots gift card and limited edition hats with the winning design.

Grassroots California’s audience participation competition hats.

3) Collaborative street art mural Local artists Berk, Plaant and Sypages, painted the white side of an RV bus over the two-day event into a 710 Cup race car scene with the mascot driver winning the race and the other characters celebrating victory with a flaming torch and dab. The plaid cat is just stone cold chillin’.

2) Hitman Glass Hitman Glass, maker of rigs and pipes, has taken Brandalism and run with it. Brandalism is common in dab culture and Hitman Glass turns dozens of recognizable cartoons and product mascots into Hitman Glass advertisements. Ready for an epic guerilla marketing campaign, stickers, T-shirts and hats of the Monopoly Man, Popeye, Toucan Sam, Calvin and Hobbes, Garfield, Rocky and Bullwinkle, Felix the Cat, Tom and Jerry, Pacman and dozens of other familiar characters hold a dab rig and covertly advertise the underground world of dabbing and Hitman Glass.

Hitman Glass “Brandalism”

1) Mila Jansen, the Queen of Marijuana. Mila Jansen, an inspiring woman and a cannabis pioneer, was onsite as a keynote speaker and an international judge for the solvent-less hash competition. She was presented with the Female Industry Achievement Award, by her most prolific student, Nikka T. of Essential Extracts. To find out more about her life and achievements, watch her film, Mila’s Journey, a recent documentary that explores several decades of Mila’s life, including her role in couture fashion, her life in India, the development of her cannabis career, and the lifestyle choices she made being a mother of four children.

Mila Jansen, circa 1960s

This article was originally written for LadyBud.  http://www.ladybud.com/